- Working on my meek and quiet spirit.
A dear girlfriend of mine let me borrow her book title Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit by Teri Maxwell. Whew! Do I need a meek and quiet spirit in EVERYTHING! I'm learning, I'm learning. Something that struck out that keeps coming back to me is this: Psalm 5:3 "In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Then Teri said "Do you? Do I? Or do we only take the time to shoot up flare prayers during each crisis that occurs throughout the day? Is this truly laying our requests before God, or is it asking Him to be a firefighter for us?" Ouch! That still stings.
- My temple.
We have joined back up at the YMCA. Today I had an appointment with the FitLinxx person. He set me up on the machines and we talked about cardio and classes. I am ready! We had the Y membership for about 2 1/2 years but I wasn't ready mentally. Neither was Bo. After much prayer and tired of being 'this way' we rejoined. God blessed us so much. We went in on the 30th of April, not thinking anything. It was the last day to join without a joining fee! So that was awesome. I am very excited to do this.
- My kids' behavior
We are working on character issues a lot these past two weeks. They are not bad, defiant, disrespectful kids but there were some things I saw that I didn't like. I repented for letting things slid. I'm bad about that, not the repenting but the slid thing. :) Anyway, God has really shown me ways to teach and train that are reaching their little hearts. He truly is the best teacher. God has also given me the confidence and patience to train them. I am no longer frustrated by the behaviors but am able to see the root and deal with it accordingly. God has shown me that I tended to think the root was one thing but never asked God or them what was truly going on. Now I ask both them and God. It's amazing, now that I am asking God to direct the correction I'm finding that somethings truly can be resolved with a good talk and hug. It reminds me of how God, our Father, is with us. It's a very sweet relationship.
- Dealing with my consequences
My girlfriend and I had a very frank conversation about this the other day. I was sharing how I wish that Bo didn't, at times, view me as the angry, spiteful person I once was. He doesn't always but I do see a guard go up from time to time. It hurts, deeply. She said that God has revealed to her that sometimes we have to sit with our consequences for awhile. Again OUCH! This is my consequence for being mean spirited, hurtful, angry, judgemental, you name it, gal. I wont give you any reasons for it. They would just be excuses. No matter how 'legit', it doesn't matter. Although I have truly repented and am on the other side of the mountain ... I did hurt him. I need to be patient and kind. I need to realize that there is a consequence to my behavior whether old or new, whether I have asked for forgiveness or not. I have no right to push my husband into forgiving or trusting me ... that is between him and God. I must do what I have been called to do. Which is to respect him, submit to him, be his helpmate ... just to name a few. :)
Well, that is where I am right now on my journey with Christ. I'm sure there are little things we are working on but those are on the forefront of my heart and mind. God is so good!