It's no secret that the past eight or so months have really been awful for me. It seems that the more I press into the things of God the further away I feel. I have a week of nothing but lovin', servin', worshipin' the Lord and then everything falls apart. Yes, I understand the enemy. This was different. You know the feeling. The feeling that the Holy Spirit gives you when it's all about you and God.
So one day last week I was in my kitchen just full of despair. I couldn't wrap my mind around what was wrong. Why did I come so far with the Lord to just stop here. Not even really knowing where here was. I closed my eyes and God showed me an orange. I watched as He peeled back the skin. Then He held the raw fruit in His hand. He held it there for a while. Exposed, naked yet still together. Next He began to open the fruit. One piece at a time until all the pieces were separated. Whole but separated.
God spoke to my spirit then. I felt our Lord telling me that when we began my healing journey, about five years ago, that that was when He peeled the skin off. Now it was time to go further. To start dealing with each piece, each section of my heart. A complete and total healing.
I am so blown away. I'm ready. I know that God has good things for me. I know that He doesn't want me to still have chains on. He truly does want me to trade my yoke of bondage for His yoke of freedom (Gal 5:1).
And He wants me to accept His forgiveness ...