It's that time of year when I sit back and do some reflecting.  Who am I kidding?  This occurs about every three to four months.  However there is something different in the Fall.  It's like the beginning of my calendar year.  Fall has always been my season.  Fall is peaceful, hopeful.  I understand it's when Earth starts to slumber and things die off.  But for some reason it just speaks of new life to me.  

I've been thinking lately about my life.  This summer was so quiet, relaxing and peaceful.  No real drama. There were no sleepless nights, no pressing issues that had me ringing my hands with worry.  Sure, we had things that took up our prayer time but the actual worry ... that was gone.  

Each obstacle was faced with an assurance that God was in control, not me.  Each question was answered with whether or not I had any control.  If I did then I would do what was needed.  If not, then I would let it go.  

Something started to happen.  God moved in such mighty ways in my and the boys' lives.  At one point God completely removed me from a situation and used other people to accomplish His goal.  Can you believe that?!  God didn't "need" me to do anything other than give it to Him and back off.  

I shudder to think that I have control issues with God.  To be honest, I sometimes (if not often) do.  I know He requires my obedience and my willingness to do what needs to be done but He doesn't need my 14 different ways to handle things.  

I'm a planner.  I always will be.  I believe God is a God of order so no, I can't just "wait til we cross that bridge" because if you know a bridge may be coming and you believe that bridge is rickety then you should plan! However I am learning that you make plans, you set a course through prayer and praise but you have to let God move.  You have to listen to the Holy Spirit so that you can walk, sit, or run.   

Even writing this there is a struggle inside me.  Part of me wants you to know that I always listen to God.  I only move when He tells me.  That I am carefully listening to the direction of The Holy Spirit.  All those are true and if you know me then you know.  This isn't about what I do.  It's more about what I'm learning not to do.  

I'm learning not to lay out a ton of different ways to work out something and then tap my toes while I wait.  It's funny to me because I trust Him completely with the BIG things.  Finances, health, safety etc.  It's the little things.  It's the minor day to day things that I have way to many opinions about.  And that my friends is what I'm learning ... to let go of the control of the little things too.  

1 Peter 5:7a NIV says "Cast all your anxiety ..."  ALL not just the big stuff, not just the little stuff, not just the stuff I have no clue about, not just the stuff I don't want to deal with.  ALL. 

Webster's Dictionary defines all like this:  

  • the whole, entire, total amount, quantity, or extent of:
  • every member or part of:
  • the whole number or sum of  
(Emphasis mine)

So there you have it ... I'm learning to cast all ...

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